I was a little sheltered growing up–with movies, that is.
Jeff (my significant other) who is a “Movie Man” by nature, almost had his eyes pop out of his head as soon as he met me and I said “No, I haven’t seen that one either” to pretty much every film title he rattled off. He knows the name to every actor since the silent films, he can quote movie after movie and writes the best reviews. It’s a passion of his that I’m pretty ignorant with. I’ll be the first to admit it. We laugh about it, even now, when he makes a reference that I don’t understand—but truth is, I’m pretty grateful that I was kept away from a lot of stuff that I’m viewing now and can’t imagine my younger self watching.
I’m okay being called sheltered.
So, naturally, you’d expect me to be on the side of the argument with the thousands of people that are now busy signing petitions to ban the new film “Beauty and the Beast” because of an openly gay moment between two male characters. I haven’t seen the movie yet, so I’m not going to judge how raunchy or racy the scene was–and frankly, it might make me uncomfortable to watch, not for the fact the characters are gay–but for the fact that I’m a prude. Seriously, ask anyone. I totally am.
But I’m not signing the petition.
You know why? Because it doesn’t matter to our kids. Watching two men kiss will not brainwash them to choose a different sexuality. Watching two men kiss will not poison their minds to think less of the relationship their parents have or their future relationships for that matter. It won’t make them commit crime or degrade future significant others. A kiss won’t make them hate their bodies or objectify the bodies of others.
But something else will. I guarantee it.
There’s a bigger issue in society that no one signs a petition for or writes blogs about or smothers social media with, and that’s because it’s not a “sexy” trend. But it’s poisoning our kids left and right. And more than two men kissing, it is creating a desensitized generation.
And that’s pornography.
I’m not just talking about the X-rated videos and images that are blatantly pornographic.
I’m talking about the fact that every movie I see nowadays it feels like it has at least one scene with a topless woman in it. I’m talking about commercials for lubricant or Viagra that cross so many lines I’ve lost track–and the sex scenes in every new release movie, music video, and even theater plays of our generation that explicitly show sex, promiscuous women, rape, strippers, sexually abusive relationships, prostitution….need I even go on? It is romanticized, glamorized, airbrushed, and lauded. It is shown so frequently and in so many ways that it has become our normal.
As a society we are helping romanticize the violation of our daughters. And we are egging our sons on to take part.
That’s on us.
There is no petition. There is no public outcry. Little by little, piece by piece, we’ve grown accustomed to it. We don’t cringe anymore or even look away. Instead, we buy tickets to the front row.
And then we wonder why our daughters feel the need to have sex in order to feel loved. We scratch our heads why women are so insecure about their bodies–and even young men for that matter. We shrug off the notion that marriages are falling apart because of this.
But there is no petition.
When I was doing research work for a thesis paper at my university I decided on the topic of pornography in western culture and the impacts it has on our generation. I went in knowing the basics and already feeling passionate about how I’ve seen it destroy lives in my personal circle. But nothing prepared me for everything else. The people I met–the stories I heard–the support groups I attended to listen to stories and to actually speak to someone who sat on the other side of metal bars, telling me his crimes all began when he became addicted to pornography.
I’m not saying that everyone who views pornography will become a murderer or even a detriment to society for that matter. But everyone WILL be affected. A psychiatrist out of Boise, ID I spoke to about the effects of pornography showed me various CT scans while I was doing my thesis research. Some scans were those of a heroin addict, some scans were those of pornography addicts. He asked me to categorize them without knowing which was which. Needless to say, I didn’t do well at his little quiz. They were hard to tell apart. Consistently viewing pornography literally changes the brain’s chemistry. Do the research.
But there’s no petition.
Whether it’s through how we view relationships or how we view women, or how we treat our marriage or the other relationships in our lives. With the images, the advertisements, and the preaching of society in this generation–none of us will walk away unscathed. We’re all part of the fire.
And that gets me angry.
It gets me angry for my little girl who has to see it, no matter how hard we try to keep it out, and who has to be a victim of it by how men or society as a whole will view her or treat her or expect her to be as she grows up.
It gets me angry for the little boys who who will be indoctrinated from a young age to think its normal–or worse yet, to become part of the problem.
But I don’t see a petition. Instead I see people uprising over two men kissing because it will CORRUPT our kids. I see Disney under the microscope with their so-called “gay” agenda, while all the while we rent “Fifty Shades Darker” as we watch it casually with a glass of wine and say it’s good entertainment.
It gets me angry. And it should get you angry too.
For as long as I can I’ll shield my little girl’s eyes from all the things that makes this world dark. I’ll try my best to show her light and love and goodness. I’ll shower her with Trolls and It’s a Small World and Charlie Brown and remind her that she’s beautiful for no other reason than because she’s smart and happy and caring and good.
So you can have your “Fifty Shades Darker” and “Magic Mike” and “Wedding Crashers” and “Showgirls”–and all the filth that slips past the petition marker.
We’ll be over here with a bucket of popcorn singing with the dancing teacups.
“Without a clear moral vision, we devolve into moral relativism, and from there, into oblivion.”
― Ben Shapiro, Porn Generation: How Social Liberalism Is Corrupting Our Future
Links to research:
http://www.apa.org/monitor/2014/04/pornography.aspx
**Note: Due to some very helpful corrections, a couple of edits have been made to the article. Thank you to all who comment–I appreciate it!
These Mountains We Climb 
With the current state of so many of the “churches” today, one would think that Jesus might well be more comfortable in a bar.
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But isn’t that where you would find him? With the outcasts, criminals, and sick? Interesting that churches think you only find him in s multimilliondollar building with a bookstore and coffee shop inside. Organized religion is just as hypocritical as the government these days…makes it hard for people to believe.
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You make a very, very good point with this article. So many Christians are indeed incensed about things like abortion and homosexual behavior and are missing the bigger picture – these things are not going to go away until we cease to be a pornographic society.
Unfortunately, from recent news headlines I’ve seen, it appears that there are many powerful people in high places ho have a vested interest in keeping the society oversexed and without restraint, especially those who prey upon others for their sexual gratification. These people are not going to allow change in this country without putting up an extreme fight to keep the subtle and not-so-subtle pornographic underpinnings of this country going for their fiscal and sexual advantage.
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“Because it doesn’t matter to our kids. Watching two men kiss will not brainwash them to choose a different sexuality. ” But what is the effect when we normalize this behavior? They will not be “brainwashed” because of this one kiss. But they are being brainwashed by the cumulative bombardment telling them this behavior is normal. When less than 20% of the population live this lifestyle but 100% of the population are expected to be supportive of this lifestyle or face the wrath of the politically correct and be labelled “bigot” there is a problem.
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Pardon me for a moment while I gather my thoughts. Did you just argue that our children should view their peers, their peers parents, their teachers, their doctors, their fellow members of society as “abnormal” because of their sexual preference? Did you just advocate for discrimination, no matter how passive you intend it to be. Did you just inadvertently shame the child who already knows they have an affinity for those of their own sex? Judgement seems to be your theme, and its not a pretty one.
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Homosexuality is and always has been “abnormal”. This country has been gradually and systematically desensitized to accept this deviant behavior. I believe the majority of Americans believe this to be so.
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You do realize that you can’t choose your sexual orientation, right? Many have tried and failed. It tends to be pretty hard wired in there, lol.
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False!
It is absolutely a choice! Just like chooseing who you are going to marry is a choice. Choosing your values and beliefs is a choice! That is lie that the world is selling. Poor thing, they have no control over this! They do too have control!!!! People have complete control over their choices. When two people choose to have sex, they are making a choice. There may be a small percentage of people who have inclinations towards it, but people are most definitely be socialized to believe that they have no control. That is how they are selling, and that is why more people are choosing it as a lifestyle. I respect that they have the right to choose, but that does not change the fact that they can make choices. And I have heard of many people who have reformed from the lifestyle and realized that living that way was wrong.
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Hunny, are you LGBT? I am. I’m pansexual. That means that I’m attracted to people’s personalities, not their genitalia. I tried to stop for many years when I was still a christian. I was a total self hating ex-gay. Eventually I realized that all that ex-gay actually is is denying what you feel. It doesn’t matter if you never have a relationship with someone of the same gender, you are still not straight. Tell yourself whatever you want, but biology is hardwired. Even my christian college professor (for human sexuality) understood and taught that.
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There is no gay kiss in the movie. Not at all. I saw an official screening of the movie. There is no “normalization of this behavior” as you put it (which is already a ridiculous statement since homosexuality has been around since the birth of man and not sure how you can say something that 10% of the popular feels/does is not “normal”).
All the claims of a “gay moment” are trumped up attempts to generate clicks and views and further manipulate the christian conservatives into focusing on made up issues rather than the actual movement away from the values that Jesup taught – charity, loving your neighbor, caring for
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Jesus is also pure,holy, and righteous. He is the living Word of God just as the Bible is the written Word of God. All sin, including homosexuallaity, is an abomination to God as it is written in the Bible.
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That behaviour you speak of is normal, your rejection and lack of acceptance is baffling and quite frankly scary. You should accept other lifestyles, cultures, and sexualities, especially if they do nothing harmful to you. Grow up and learn that being gay or anything else outside of heterosexuality is okay. It irks me that this is still something people have yet to comprehend.
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Thank you so much for this article! Thank you for shining a light on the root of the problem and the strongest aspect of what truly will effect this coming generation!
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I have lived in Europe and America, and I think that Americans put too much emphasis and importance on pornography/nudity/etc… You see nudity in Europe, but it is just a nude body. It’s not shameful. I think that there’s a big difference in wanting more for our daughters than to be sexual objects and accepting that nudity exists and is normal. It’s not just magazines/movies that sexualize things, it’s parents too who make everything very shameful.
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Thank you so much for this! I agree so much!
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There’s a major difference between just plain nudity and what porn is doing. There’s very concrete evidence for how it alters the brain, especially in men. There was one attempted study to discern the difference between men in the age 20-30 who do and don’t view porn… they were unable to find enough men for a control group (those who do not view). Along with that, doctor’s are seeing an outrageously high number of men in that same age bracket who are needing antidepressants, antianxiety, and ED medications because of their viewing habits. This is not just because Americans have made a big deal about nudity. (I’ve lived overseas as well; the problem is just as prevalent there as it is here, but no one is taking about it).
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There are groups fighting against pornography. Check out Fight the New Drug’s facebook page https://www.facebook.com/fightthenewdrug/?hc_ref=SEARCH&fref=nf
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I came here to talk about FTND and Porn Harms, while hoping someone else already did. Thanks!
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I thought you would be discussing the issue of being held captive and eventually falling in love with the captive…..whose beastly tendicies aren’t even hidden. Little girls are taught that falling in love with a man who imprisons you, yells at you, etc. is normal, and that your love can change him into a prince. I think you missed an important point.
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Another reason not to sign the petition against the “Beauty and the Beast” gay kiss: there is no gay kiss in “Beauty and the Beast.”
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Click to access nvsr63_04.pdf
Teen pregnancy rates have been declining steadily for years. Sorry; I don’t mean to be the guy that focuses on that one thing that isn’t really the point of your message; however, incorrect data dilutes its impact.
Cheers!
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I’m not sure where you got that info, but it’s not true. Teen pregnancy, especially since getting rid of abstinence-only sex Ed, has increased massively.
The teen BIRTH rate, however, is the number the CDC wants to focus on… they’re not telling you that the age group getting the most abortions are the very same. It’s difficult to find the numbers accurate bc many clinics do not verify age OR alter reporting. Take note of the semantics on most reporting… “birth” rate (versus *total pregnancies reported*), “legal” abortions, etc… as is the case with any statistics based story, the numbers you read are the only ones they want you to see.
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I think these two are the same problem, actually. A certain percentage of the population has always been gay, and instead of focusing on the many couples who have spent decades together as loving couples, there is only a focus on sex. And instead of focusing on relationships between heterosexuals, there is a hyper focus on sex and people simply become objects. Our little boys are brainwashed and have their brains over-sexualized so that they will become consumers of pornography in all its forms. And our little girls are brainwashed into believing their value is based on how “sexy” they are to the point they change their bodies to look like porn stars and spend billions on beauty products. Everything is sexualized in this country because “sex sells” and money is more valuable than people and love.
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Well said and thank you.
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This is a subject that gets tip toed around to often. Thank you for sharing.
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While I’m not signing any petitions or pitching a public fit about Disney (bc they’ve been spiraling for a LONG time, so this won’t make a difference), neither will I be viewing this movie. My five homeschool sons are all under age 12 and are still quite innocent (call them sheltered if you want, but I’m letting them stay children mentally as long as I can). I know that as a family we’re not ready to explain homosexuality to them; their brains aren’t ready for it. I have friends and family as part of that community and when it’s time I will teach them love and compassion that is the basis of our faith.
All that said, because 1) their daddy escaped porn addiction and 2) the average age of exposure is getting younger every year, we are explaining to them how dangerous it is. (Because they’re WAY more likely to be confronted with porn than they are with homosexuality). I wholeheartedly agree that the outcries of morality have become terribly distorted and there *should* be a disgusted, passionate fight against the porn industry. I’m all for it! I’m baffled by crowds will wave signs, wear vulgar hats, and scream about Trump’s misconduct, but then line up for a ticket for Fifty Shades. Please keep writing and when the petition is passed, I’ll gladly sign it!
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You probably should not move to North Texas if you want to keep them sheltered. Our bishops will explain pornography and masturbation when they go for their priesthood interview, and they’ll do age-appropriate (but frank) discussions in Senior Primary.
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We have already discussed those with our sons… keyword WE. However, *discussing* masturbation and porn are TOTALLY different than letting world willy-nilly bombard their young minds. I love how our aims to protect their innocence bring assumptions that we’re ignorant and not preparing them for life…
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There’s no gay kiss in the movie… just for the record.
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I know. This was actually a publicity ploy to take everyone’s focus off the gay kids that WAS in a Disney channel cartoon the same week… it apparently totally worked!
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I didn’t read most of the comments, but in case no one else has said this, teen pregnancy rates are in decline. I agree with just about everything else you’ve said in the article though.
https://www.cdc.gov/teenpregnancy/about/
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Just to point out something… please be wary of semantics when looking at any government stats. This link shows the teen BIRTH rate. I looked around the web and cannot find the stats for the actual number of *pregnancies*, which, kind of like vaccine stats, are presented in a way to keep people from asking the hard questions. I found several places saying the teen pregnancy rate has dropped but then only backed that up with BIRTH rate stats. That doesn’t tell us how many were terminated, miscarried, stillborn, etc. There’s speculation that the teen demographic is WAY higher than anyone wants to discuss and another reason there’s such animosity about defunding Planned Parenthood (who are making insane amounts of money harvesting these young womens’ babies. Yes, I said “harvesting”) In the realm of money making, you can’t fathom how much money a desperate pregnant teen is worth. It’s disgusting.
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WORD!!! Well said 🙌🙌🙌
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The only thing that matters at all is what God thinks: all forms of sexuality outside of His definition of marriage are the only parts in eternity that will hold up and matter at all. All justification will fall away. It is not applaudable to watch homosexual scenes and think it’s somehow morally more upright than watching straight or gay porn. Both are equally devastating in the eternal picture.
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I really think it’s sad to lie to your readers and influence them in a certain way. There is absolutely no “gay” kiss or “gay” agenda in the whole movie. Not one scene do two men kiss at all. You should really re word this.
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I hope you don’t read the comments. I agree with you 100%. And so would anyone who could let go of their own agenda and try to find out what’s good for our children -and ourselves. You pared it down and people who have their own issues and problems are going to try and discount it. Their arguments do not hold up. Even if you were ‘anti-gay’, how does that discount your point that sexualizing everything is not healthy for our children???!! It doesn’t. And THAT is the truth.
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I guess I should’ve expected so much flack for this. However, I hope you’re encouraged by the positive comments. This is an issue that is destroying relationships and families, but is praised and plastered on the side of the road. Well done with this article.
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So, Hunny, when did you choose to be straight?
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Start the petition I’ll sign it, why can’t every webpage, song, picture, video be force to have a rating, so I can personally censer them with my router.
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Paul, very good comment. I have long thought the same about rating just about everything, especially books read for enjoyment. I don’t want to be in the middle of a good book and turn the page to find a disgusting swear word or more.
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Hey there ! visit https://nfskil.wordpress.com/2017/06/02/xxxfightthenewdrugtop-secret/
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This is such a great read ! Totally agree with you and wish there were more I could do!
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